Mother, Daughter Reunite For Christmas

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By Chelsea Rabideau

Story Published: Dec 19, 2011 at 6:52 PM MDT

Story Updated: Dec 21, 2011 at 7:57 AM MDT

BILLINGS - This Christmas, a Billings mother is spending the holiday with the daughter she gave up 42 years ago.

Among the holiday travelers arriving at Billings' Logan International Airport, one family shared an emotional reunion. Julie Hacket says, "It's a very special day. It'll be the first Christmas I'll be spending with the woman who gave life to me in Billings, MT in 1969."'

42 years ago, Sandy Nilsson gave her baby girl up for adoption. "I learned to accept that I couldn't keep Julie at the time at the age that I was. I was 19 but I felt like I was 16. Giving her up, I always prayed that she went to a good home," Sandy explains.

Both Julie and Sandy searched for each other for decades. "Every year I would think about her and when the internet came up I started searching and searching and searching knowing that the adoptions were closed and Julie was the one to find me and I couldn't find her which really hurt," says Sandy.

The two eventually found each other on Adoption Registry Connect and Monday afternoon, Julie found her way back to Billings and back to her biological mother. "Basically this Christmas, I want to give the gift of hope and encouragement. The adoption records in the state of Montana are closed and it took me 42 years to find my mom by chance with social media," says Julie.

Although they had met before the Billings reunion, Julie says the emotion is still overwhelming. She says, "The first thing, obviously we found each other this year and I thought that it was just going to be a little easier this time but, seeing her in Billing where it all started was...My heart was racing. And then to see her standing with my father's family who, he passed away and he would be so proud to know that I'm here with my birth mom."

Julie says her own daughter Jayden is thrilled to spend the holidays with her newfound family. She adds her adoptive parents were always very supportive of her desire to find her biological mother.

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nellie said on Monday, Dec 26 at 8:11 PM

Sounds to me that Jennifer hasn't really gotten in touch with the greatest loss one can ever endure in one's life, the loss of one's mother (or child). I know of no firstmom who gave up her child willingly. Usually, she was the one who gave up, due to lack of support from family, boyfriend, or society.

c gray said on Monday, Dec 26 at 4:30 AM

Great registry. Lots of reunions happen on registries and cuz of "search angels" good registries: register with the state and agency. Gsadoptionregistry.com Adoptionregistry.com Adopteeconnect.com On FBook for adopted kids looking for parents. There are support vroups for parents and sibs too

search angel said on Monday, Dec 26 at 4:24 AM

A wonderful reunion with love on all sides. Now medical history, family relations and healing can truly come to be. The ongoing scientific studies reveal the genetic domination of who we are which may then be molded by upbringing and conscious choices. Hurrah for those secure enuff and open enuff to embrace their entire family and its history!

Laura said on Saturday, Dec 24 at 2:07 AM

I think we can all agree that Jennifer drank the adoption Kool-Aid that the rest of us avoided. We each have our own thoughts and feelings on our individual adoptions yet I always wonder when someone is so vehement, as she is, that there's a strong element of denial in there as well.

Michele said on Friday, Dec 23 at 5:13 PM

Ouch. I have to chime in. We need to be careful to not judge as everyone's situation is different. My father was adopted and we recently found his biological mother. She was young, unwed, and told she would not keep him. It was very painful for her. We were just recently reunited shortly after my dad's 59th birthday. He has made the comment that he has two moms. Yes, he does. Just because his mother did not raise him does not make her role in his life any less. And just because his mother did not give birth to him makes her role in his life any less.

adoptee said on Tuesday, Dec 20 at 6:29 PM

I do have to say though Jennifer a mother is someone who loves you and does what is best for her child and situation. But again to each there own.

adoptee said on Tuesday, Dec 20 at 6:23 PM

Everybody's situation is different so I understand how Jennifer may feel the way she does so "underage" that comment is uncalled for. My birth mother and I met just over two years ago and my mom was there for the first meeting. It was an amazing moment in my life they were happy to meet. My mommy thanked her for giving me life while my birth mother thanked her for raising such a great young woman. It meant the world to me and I wouldn't trade either of them. It was meant to happen this way. I guess my bottom line is weather you want to meet the family you came from or not be thankful for the life you have and if you seek more I hope you find what you are looking for.

kathy said on Tuesday, Dec 20 at 2:48 PM

I was adopted and I at 16 also had a daughter that I Gave up for adoption. that was 32 years ago and I hope to find her before I die

A birth-Mother said on Tuesday, Dec 20 at 10:21 AM

I gave up my son when I was 16 to a wonderful family, luckily I chose an open adoption. He is 18 and a wonderful man. I am his mother and so is his adoptive mother. I chose the right life for him. I wanted to keep him but I also knew that at 16 I would not be able to give him all that he deserves. He does not have a void and I do not begrudge not raising him. I am just another person who loves him. Just because I gave up my son to be raised by another family does not mean that I am not a part of who he is. I am his mother. One of his mothers. His other mother knows that and so does he. So Jennifer, I am happy that you do not have a void, but that does not take away the motherhood of those women who chose to do something very special for their child. 

underager said on Tuesday, Dec 20 at 8:46 AM

Jennifer should be grateful she wasn't aborted?

roxy said on Monday, Dec 19 at 11:03 PM

not everyone feels that way Jennifer

Jennifer said on Monday, Dec 19 at 10:41 PM

I think it is aweful of her to look at it that way. That woman is NOT her mother, she gave birth to her, but a mother is the one who loves you enough to raise you! It's not "a nice family that raised her" it HER family, and that is her birthgiver, she did none of the actual parenting and I hope she knows enough to understand that. I am extrememly grateful to my birth giver, but I don't need to meet her or fill some empty void. I have a mother!

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